As part of my character, I tend to persevere. I’m not a quitter when things get hard (well, except for running). When faced with the choice of stay or go, staying is often the choice that seems easiest.
Time to move:? It’s easier not to.
Time to change jobs? It’s easier not to.
But sometimes staying becomes harder than leaving.
In my marriage, it was abundantly clear within the first 6 months that it never should have happened.
I should have left. I should have admitted our mistake and moved on.
I didn’t. I stayed for nine more years.
But in that ninth year, the choice was clear. It was clearly less difficult to go than stay.
Not that I took the decision to divorce lightly. I definitely did not. I had given it my all for nine years. And my all wasn’t good enough.
To stay meant to sacrifice my life. To sacrifice my children’s lives. Just for the sake of staying.