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People will buy anything…

The Things and I have been debating about having a garage sale.

We need some cash to help us buy Thing One a car. Add to that the fact that we have a lot of stuff. Most of which we don’t need.

I’m trying to live a more simplified life. Less stuff = less to keep track of, to pick up, to clean.

Less stuff + more cash sounds like a perfect equation for a garage sale.

But oh, how I hate sitting around letting people rifle through my stuff.

yard sale, tag sale

I also hate the fact that an archenemy or a zombie could just stop by at any time during my garage sale and I’d basically be trapped and have to make polite conversation.

Nothing worse than polite conversation with a zombie. Unless it’s polite conversation with people you thought you would never have to see again.

When I held my last garage sale, I made a whopping $200. It took me two weeks of work every day after my day job to get ready for the thing, plus two days of standing around in a sticky garage, waiting for people to make completely unreasonable offers on stuff that I wanted to get rid of…and then me TAKING that offer because I want it gone and I want the cash.

I probably made $0.03 per HOUR.


But I have great memories of having garage sales. My grandmother (who refused to have her OWN garage sale because she didn’t want people rifling through her stuff – see where I get that?) was the Queen of organizing other people’s garage sales.

She’d bring a lasagna (easy meal to bake while working the garage sale) and a box of honey buns (gotta have breakfast before it starts).

She’d bring her homemade “garage sale apron.” I still have mine.

And we’d have a garage sale.

Grandma believed (and rightly so) that people will buy anything.

Case in point: We were living in Nebraska and had a garage sale. My mother had a large ceramic vase she was selling that had dried flowers in it. Someone wanted to only buy the flowers. So, my grandmother sold them to her for $1. Then Grandma looked around, noticed that our hay field hadn’t been mowed lately. She took shears and cut down a couple of bunches of hay, tied a ribbon around them, and sold them for $1. She ultimately sold 10 of them. 

Grandma wouldn’t judge the success of the garage sale solely on the amount of money collected that day. It had to be tempered with the following statement:

We took in $______ and only had ____ items over $5!

I miss her.

I would have a garage sale in a second if she could be here.

Maybe I’ll have one in her honor. I’ll make a lasagne, buy some honey buns, tie on my apron and show the Things how it’s done.